Formal Closure - what have I gained?

Though, I could not complete my entire tour, I have gained a lot from it already!!! What have I gained? Have a look...

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Mahipal,

I hope you are feeling better and enjoying a little TLC from family as its the best there is!

I was both relieved and saddened to hear that you have decided to end your Tour of India. It was with such good intention and optimism that you undertook this journey (both literal and spiritual) but I think events have really conspired against you and understand it goes against any sense of realism to try to go on.

It was a day I will remember when we met on a humid night in beautiful Palolem and sat down to discuss pretty much everything from religion to philosophy and politics till the early hours. It also brought home to me that I had met someone special as we discussed so many potentially contentious issues yet were able to debate them and still be looking forward to meeting for breakfast the next morning! It was a joy to be able to talk to someone who had such a wonderfully refreshing outlook on life and reassuring to have so much in common with someone with such a different culteral background.

I will definitely be back in India at some point and will of course always stay in touch. I have gone nearly completely round the world now on my own little journey and you are definitely one of the most special people I have met - if you can make it to Canada then there will always be a room for you there.

I would like to end my rambling blog with a quote a Peruvian friend once told me which i think is very relevant:

"God creates them, they find eachother!"

Thank you for inviting me to be a part of your tour and thank you for being a part of my tour.

Take care and i hope your feet get well soon,

Ben
British friend and travelling companion
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Dear Mahipal

I read your latest Nov 8th writeup on the blog. I was really moved with your writing on your states of mind and your search for peace.

I wish you speedy recovery and all the best in your future endavours.

I'll be very happy to help you in what ever I can. If you are persuing a company career, you are most welcome anytime. You can join our Internal Secruity Team in Mumbai or Pune as per your likings.

Hope you find answers to the questions you have come across soon. I think spiritiualists and philosophers have relavent answers to your queries.

Wishing to soon talk to you and meet you.

Regards
Vasanth Pai
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Hey Mahipal,

I didn’t know about this endeavor of yours. Well, hats off to you for the braveness that you have shown. You really tried something which most don’t even dare to think of attempting. I saw a lot of your pictures; they are really amazing and show how much you would have enjoyed living your dream. Well, it doesn’t matter much whether you succeeded or you failed, whether you choose one path or another, but you atleast tried and achieved something which others like me won’t. I would like to know more about this tour of yours and would also be interested in knowing more about a lot of things, such as your book, your accident, your experiences, etc. You have surely made me realize that there is much much more to life, beyond our routines, beyond our usual imagination.

I am sure you want to rest for a while at least. I would be coming to India in December second half. I have noted down your number and would surely like to talk to you, if we can’t meet. Eager to see you. Three cheers for you.

Keep in Touch,
Parag Parikh

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END OF TOUR, END OF BLOG

Hello friends,

Thank you very much for your wishes and showing me that you are indeed with me in this tour. With the help of your wishes and by God’s grace, my feet are recovering well. My right foot has almost recovered. However, due to a little deep burn in my left foot, it is still raw and will take atleast a month or more to recover fully. So, I had decided to travel (ofcourse by car, with my brothers) back from Bangalore to my home town of Amreli in Gujarat (2000 Kms). I am currently in Amreli with my parents, enjoying homely food, motherly care and family criticism (for my decision of doing The Tour of India) :)

Also, for past few days, I have been thinking and I have come to a conclusion that this has to be the END of my “THE TOUR OF INDIA”.

I know, this will come as a surprise / shock to all of you, because in my recent communications to you, I was very upbeat about continuing it further. Actually, I have been thinking about it for past few days and was more inclined towards continuing it, so were my replies too. However, few things became very clear to me now and so this decision. For the kind of response and support that I have been getting from you, I believe, you deserve an explanation from me. Well, it’s the following that has shaped my decision:

Lack of belief that what I am doing now is the best that I could be doing for myself.

Let me explain – while starting the tour, I thought that this tour will help me get away from all the materialistic and emotional attachments and go to Mother Nature with pure heart and mind. It will also give me an opportunity to meet many different people and will help me understand them and eventually help me understand myself thru them. Well, I did meet many different people and it certainly helped me understand them and myself better. But, when I look at myself thru this understanding, I feel, I am no different. I am still emotionally and materialistically very attached to so many things. I believe, I have attained a certain level of peace within me, but these attachments of mine are no help in sustaining it. Somehow, I am unable to be completely peaceful in the company of Mother Nature.

After a lot of soul searching, I found the root cause that makes me vulnerable. The main cause is that I am very emotionally attached to so many people like my parents, my family and my friends. This actually divides me in two pieces from within. The one half wants to be a normal, office going, money earning, family man (as per the wishes and expectations of my parents and my family), I call it the family side. And the other half wants me to keep being adventurous, risk taking, living life fully kind of a person (as per likings of my friends and well wishers), I call it the friends side. While, if I look at my dream for myself, I want to be detached and peaceful person (I call it peaceful mind or the desired state). This 3-way complication keeps disturbing whatever peace and understanding about life that I have attained so far.

I started this tour hoping to move away from first two of the above mentioned states towards the third state of mind. However, due to your overwhelming response and love, I started moving towards the second state of mind. Somehow, I started believing that I am that kind of a person from within. Also, the recent events (my accident) and my interaction with my family has brought back all the sleeping emotions (from the first state of mind) in me and has again triggered that same old battle within me between these two states of mind. This situation combined with my efforts to write a book titled “confessions of a peaceful mind”, has brought me to this understanding that I have described above.

Now, I feel that by continuing the tour, I am not moving towards my desired state of mind. It also is triggering very negative reactions from the first state of mind (the family side). I am really sorry, I might not be able to keep in touch with you frequently as I am at home trying to get myself relieved from my family responsibilities and attempt to win over my first state of mind (the family side). I am unsure as to where exactly will I be and what exactly will I be doing in near future. I will be back in touch with you all when I will be able to sustain the desired level of peace within me.

I really apologize for any kind of disturbance / distraction this whole TOUR OF INDIA might have caused to you. I am really sorry. I would also like to thank you all for all your support. Especially, Pratapsan, Hirensan, KKsan, Virupaji, Ketansan and Avisan… I know how much attached you were to the tour and how much you would have wanted it to be completed but I am really sorry. This is necessary. I am sure, you will understand.

Lastly, by stopping the tour, I am not disturbed or hurt or anything like that. Infect, I am feeling more peaceful. May be that’s the only reward I can take out of my endeavor so far. And may be that’s the final prize (a sustained peace) towards what I have started moving. The only thing that comes to my mind right now is the only poem that I wrote in my whole life.

When I came in this world,

I was alone.

When I will leave,

I will be alone.

When I came in this world,

There were people around me,

Smiling at me, I was crying.

When I will leave,

There will be people around me,

Crying for me, I will be smiling.

When I came in this world,

I was alone,

I did not know fear.

When I will leave this world,

I will be alone,

I will not care about fear.

If I am alone today,

Why am I afraid?

May God bless you all with Happiness, Love and Peace.

Mahipal

PS: This blog would surely make one chapter of my book “Confessions of a peaceful mind” :)